


A Taste of the Good Stuff

by thelittlestpurplecat



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Bucky is seventeen, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff and Smut, Internalized Homophobia, Kissing, M/M, Neck Kissing, Nipple Play, Period-Typical Homophobia, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Pre-war era, Steve is sixteen, Touching, Underage Drinking, Underage sexual activity, and the two of them need to get their shit together and admit they are crazy about each other, angsty love confessions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-02
Updated: 2015-01-02
Packaged: 2018-03-05 00:54:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3098978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelittlestpurplecat/pseuds/thelittlestpurplecat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky turned his gaze back to Steve, allowing his eyes to sweep up and down his body for just a fraction of a second. “Y’know,” Bucky drawled casually, reaching over to the coffee table, setting the glass down with a chink. “I could let ya try the good stuff.” He offered, tossing a conspiratorial glance at the liquor cabinet. “You’d prob’ly like it, an mom and dad’ll never notice.”</p><p>He couldn’t admit it, even to himself, but he was curious to see what his best friend would be like drunk. He knew he liked the pleasant buzz that the alcohol left in the back of his skull, he wondered if Steve would too. Would Steve have a hard time filtering what came out of his mouth like he did? Would he be the kind of drunk who slurred out philosophical rants about justice? Probably. Would Steve be overly affectionate? If they were drunk, and he kissed Steve would it count? Would it count if Steve kissed him back?</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Taste of the Good Stuff

"God Buck! That’s disgusting!" Steve gagged, a wet cough escaping his throat as he lowered the glass away from his damp, pink lips.

A playful grin flickered across his best friend’s features as he reached over, receiving the glass from Steve’s slender fingers. “Little much for ya Stevie?” He joked, raising the glass to his mouth and watching Steve over the rim of the glass. His eyes were locked on his best friend, gleaming with mischief and good humor. Bucky’s plump lower lip rested softly against the rim, still flushed very red from earlier, when he’d bitten it in anticipation of seeing Steve’s reaction to the drink.

It was a foul concoction, made from a few splashes of whatever had been in his parent’s liquor cabinet. Times were hard, but Bucky’s family lived comfortably. They could afford to have a few bottles of alcohol around. Growing up, Bucky had been allowed to taste the different drinks whenever his parents had indulged in the alcohol; he’d developed an interest in the flavor, and had been eager to see Steve’s reaction. The expression that the concoction had coaxed from Steve would be worth the guilt he would later experience for snitching the liquor.

Once again, Steve wrinkled his nose, a little shudder running up his crooked spine. “Why the _hell_ did you think I would have wanted that in my _mouth_?” Steve scoffed, the burning sensation still lingering in the back of his throat. His lifted his gaze to Bucky, seeing the other boy’s flushed lips pull into a smirk against the rim of the glass. And that was all it took to get butterflies fluttering in Steve’s stomach.

Steve tried to tell himself that he was sick, real sick for thinkin’ about his best friend like that. But every time he saw Bucky grinning, and running his tongue over his absolutely sinful red lips, Steve wondered what they’d feel like against his own. Since he was a little kid, he’d thought about stealing a peck against his best friend’s lips. Recently though, as he and Bucky had grown older, Steve’s fantasies had grown more obscene.

Now, watching Bucky tip the glass against his mouth, swallowing down a gulp of the amber liquid, Steve’s imagination wandered to feeling Bucky’s lips against his neck. He could imagine the firm, wet warmth, the feeling of Bucky’s talented tongue licking a hot strip up his exposed throat. His mind, captivated by his best friend’s long, slender fingers, fixated on the thought of feeling Bucky’s hands running over his narrow ribcage. Steve could almost feel him touching his waist, his thighs; chilly fingers working into his slacks, stroking over his-

"-Stevie."

Steve’s head snapped up, and he could feel heat rising to his sunken cheeks. “What?” He blurted dumbly, trying to ignore twitch of interest between his thighs as Bucky scooted closer.

"Asked if y’wanted the last’a this." He said, extending the glass to go once again. The last swallow of the mix swirled around in the bottom of the glass, looking deceptively alluring, it’s amber coloring reflected so pleasantly in the dim light of the living room. But Steve knew better.

"No thanks," Steve said with an easy laugh, leaning back on his elbows and trying his best to forget about his filthy imagination. "I’ll try alcohol again when y’stop tryin’a poison me."

Bucky eyed him for a moment, making sure he wouldn’t change his mind before giving a flippant shrug. “Suit yourself.” He murmured, draining the last of the glass. Steve was right, it was awful, and it made Bucky’s eyes water, but he had his pride. And then there was always the off chance that Steve would be impressed, but it wasn’t likely. _Nothing_ impressed Steve.

Bucky swallowed hard, keeping his expression impassive regardless of how much he wanted to shudder in disgust. Once the urge had passed, Bucky turned his gaze back to Steve, allowing his eyes to sweep up and down his body for just a fraction of a second. “Y’know,” Bucky drawled casually, reaching over to the coffee table, setting the glass down with a _chink_. “I could let ya try the good stuff.” He offered, tossing a conspiratorial glance at the liquor cabinet. “You’d prob’ly like it, an mom and dad’ll never notice.”

Steve buffered a moment, looking hesitant. Not because he felt morally obligated _not_ to drink, or even that he was scared, but he didn’t want to take advantage of Bucky’s parents. They were always so nice to him. They were always willing to help him out when his mom was working late at the hospital. He didn’t know that he was comfortable with Bucky stealing from his parents to give him a chance to try something new.

"I dunno." Steve said with a non-committal shrug, still feeling curious despite himself.

"It’ll be fine." Bucky said shortly, hauling himself off the couch and padding in his bare feet towards the kitchen. "But I’ll warn you though, this stuff’ll get ya tipsy fast ‘kay Stevie?" He turned back to face him, hovering in the doorway to the kitchen. He couldn’t admit it, even to himself, but he was curious to see what his best friend would be like drunk. He knew he liked the pleasant buzz that the alcohol left in the back of his skull, he wondered if Steve would too. Would Steve have a hard time filtering what came out of his mouth like he did? These were the questions that had always gotten Bucky curious. Was Steve a cranky drunk, or a giggly drunk? Would he be the kind of drunk who slurred out philosophical rants about justice? Probably. Would Steve be overly affectionate if he were drunk? If they were drunk, and he kissed Steve would it count? Would it count if Steve kissed him back?

Bucky abruptly chided himself for the though, tossing it aside _. Of course_ Bucky knew he’d never purposely try to get his friend drunk in the hopes that they could share a measure of ill-advised affection, but he _was_ curious. Steve, on the other hand, was thinking the exact same thing, but unlike Bucky, the thought terrified him.

Steve swallowed, still feeling Bucky’s eyes on him from the doorway. What if he _did_ get drunk, and he couldn’t stop himself, and he kissed Bucky? He’d ruin everything. What if the alcohol loosened his lips and he divulged his filthy little secret about the feelings and thought he had about him? He wanted to kiss Bucky, _god_ he wanted too, but it wasn’t worth it if their friendship was destroyed in its wake. No. He couldn’t let that happen.

"Actually-" he started, but Bucky had turned quickly away from him, disappearing into the kitchen.

Bucky made his way back to the liquor cabinet, trying to shake the weird sensation that bubbled in the pit of his stomach at the thought of kissing Steve. He knew as well as Steve that boys were supposed to pull on little girl’s pigtails, and share their lunches with a pretty little thing in a blue dress. Boys were supposed to take girls to the fair when it came into town, they were supposed to grow up and marry a fine lookin’ dame and have a bunch a kids. Boys weren’t supposed to think about kissing their best friend…Bucky swallowed hard, finding himself suddenly shaky. Technically, he’d already kissed Steve once before, but they been _five_ for god sake! Bucky had watched his Ma see his dad off with a kiss when he left for work. When Steve had had to go home from their play date that afternoon, Bucky had seen him off with a kiss just like he’d watched. Steve didn’t remember, he’d only been four, but Bucky remembered. He’d remembered the whole while. Of course he’d brushed it off as one of those stupid things that kids do when they’re too young to know better. Whenever he’d though about kissing Steve after that, he’d dismissed it as just being nostalgic about when they were brats. But Bucky had grown older, and the urge hadn’t faded. The first time Bucky had realized that he wanted to kiss Steve for real, he’d been fifteen. He’d gone into a full-scale panic attack, shutting himself in his room and crying until his lungs ached. He’d been terrified. Because boy weren’t supposed to like other boys.

Bucky spent the whole day in bed, fighting off nausea and panic, crying and trying to shut out thoughts of Steve. If anyone found out…he didn’t know, but there’d be trouble. No one could know…The next few days weren’t any better, because he’d had to see Steve at school, he had to look at his pretty pink lips and try not to wonder if they were as warm as he remembered. That had been three years ago, and having feelings for Steve had ceased to make him feel ill. He’d come to terms with it now, but he’d never do anything about it, cause that was just how things had to be.

The dark haired boy steadied himself, forcing his hands to stop trembling as he selected the nicest liquor from the cabinet. It was pricier than the others, but his parents would never miss a few swallows. It was just enough to give Steve a taste, because if Bucky was guilty of anything, it was doting on Steve. He deserved nothing but the best. Bucky didn’t have the best, but he could offer him the nicest they had. He pushed himself up to his feet, turning on his heel to reenter the living room.

Steve looked up as Bucky strolled back over to the couch; bottle in hand, all confidence and swagger. There was no telling that he’d been suddenly shaky with desire only moment ago. Steve managed a thin little smile as Bucky set the bottle on the coffee table with a muted thump, looking victorious.

"See what’cha think’a that Stevie." He drawled, dropping down beside him, his long legs splayed, one arm draped over the arm. He watched him under half-lidded eyes, smirking, his wet tongue poking distractingly from between his parted lips.

"Actually," Steve tried again, rising reluctantly from the couch. "I should go Buck, my Ma’ll be home soon."

Bucky blinked, disappointment twisting in his gut. “What? Now?” He asked, pulling himself up and hurrying to follow Steve to the door. “C’mon Steve! My folks are out all night, we’ve got the joint to ourselves, lets have a little fun with it!” Bucky insisted, taking his friend’s arm, stopping him before he reached the door.

Steve managed a pained expression. “I know. Wish I could but- Buck, my Ma-”

And that was it. Steve’s mom would be expecting him. It was the bottom line. Steve had to go. Bucky breathed a reluctant sigh, releasing Steve’s arm. “Kay…” He muttered, stooping to grab his shoes. “It’s a long way, I’ll walk ya back.”

Steve granted him a small, grateful smile. Brooklyn wasn’t always friendly at night. He would be happy for Bucky’s company. He stooped down, pulling on his tread worn shoes over the patched and mended sock he was wearing. If he could get a few more weeks out of them, it would save his Ma a lot of money that they could be using for more important things. Steve straightened, pulling on his coat, and turning to face Bucky, who was fully ready. “Okay?” Steve asked, grabbing the doorknob.

Bucky nodded shortly. “Yep, lets get you home.” The blond hair boy returned the nod, and pulled open the door.

Cold air gusted into the house, bringing with it a thick flurry of snow that blinded, and bit at the boy’s cheeks. Even without fully leaving the safety of the house, the winter storm outside stung any exposed bit of flesh, turning it chapped and raw. Thick white swirled around on a backdrop of pitch black, making it impossible to discern even where the top stop met the pavement.

Instinctively, Bucky pulled Steve back away from the entrance, turning in to shield him from the wind as he yanked the door shut. The vacuum created by the sudden gust caused all the windows in the house to shudder in protest, finally released as the door slammed shut.

Bucky turned, face flushed, yanking his coat off. “No way in _hell_ I’m letting you out there.” He snapped, kicking off his shoes.

"Bucky!" Steve argued, squirming and smacking at his friend’s hands as he tried to strip him of his coat. "Bucky, my Ma’ll worry! She’s gonna be home soon and she’ll-"

"-be a lot more upset if you die out there and they find your thawing corpse in the spring." Bucky finished, succeeding in getting Steve’s coat off his arms despite the struggle.

"I’ll be fine!" Steve countered, starting in alarm as, in a few swift movements, Bucky managed to step his shoes of his feet. "Bucky stop!" Steve said testily, his brow creasing in a frown.

"I’m not letin’ you kill yerself out there."

"Bucky!"

Bucky fixed him with one mutinous look, before suddenly lunging forward, his strong arms clamping around Steve’s narrow waist as he dragged him back into the living room. Steve let out an embarrassing squeal of alarm, thrashing against the sudden assault. Bucky tackled his best friend to the couch, nearly knocking the bottle of liquor off the coffee table when Steve’s heel jarred against the wood.

"No! Bucky!" Steve shrieked, his crooked spine arching as Bucky’s cold fingers found their way to his ribs. He twisted violently, managing to get himself turned around in Bucky’s arms so that the bigger boy’s chest was against his own. He writhed against Bucky, catching occasional glimpses of his best friend’s face, lit up like the sun, grinning as he tickled Steve. By this point, Steve was completely helpless. Bucky had immobilized him, Steve’s legs, wrapped around Bucky’s waist, kicked fruitlessly. His wrist were held over his head in one of Bucky’s strong hands. The other was still working into Steve’s ribs and underarms, coaxing shrieks of laughter from the skinny blond boy.

Bucky finally let up, but only when he grew concerned that the shortness of breath might spur on an asthma attack. Slowly, he released Steve’s wrists, still braced over him, chest heaving. “Y’need yer asthma cigs Stevie? Bucky panted, face pink, cheeks aching from his grin. “Got yer bag right here if ya do.”

Steve swallowed hard, managing a little shake of his head. Bucky was awfully close… Steve could feel the other boy’s breath on his lips…His hips were pressing between Steve’s legs…his hand were braced on either side of his head…God…this was like every dirty dream he’d ever woken up from in a hot sweat. This was like the start if every lewd dream that had had him shaking in a freezing cold shower.

Bucky frowned, noticing the change in his friend’s disposition. He looked kind of shocked…”Stevie?” Bucky pressed, trying to ignore how good it felt to have Steve’s leg around his waist, to feel the other boy’s body under his own. Steve didn’t respond to the gentle prompt, staring up at him in distracted silence. His lips were just inches away… It would be so easy to kiss them… Bucky’s Adam’s apple bobbed uncertainly as he swallowed, feeling warm all over; light headed. He could feel his ability to reason slipping away from him as he was intoxicated purely by the sight of Steve lying underneath him. Bucky’s resolve wavered, his head dipped closer. His breath ghosting across Steve’s open mouth.

And suddenly Bucky pulled back. He sat up, his hand pulling away from the side of Steve’s head and he straightened, looking away. His cheeks had flushed crimson, and shame curled hot in the pit of his stomach. Steve was probably going to freak out, or at least demand what the hell he’d thought he was doin’ putting his nasty gross mouth that close t’his. What was he gonna think if he put two and two together? He’d be disgusted for sure, cause Bucky was a fuckin’ fag and he was tryin’a put the moves on him. Was he going to jump to conclusions about his motives for keeping him here tonight; alone in the house with him? God he hoped not. Even if he ever could confess his feelings to Steve, he’d never try an’ trap him here; use the weather as an excuse to keep him alone with him even if he was uncomfortable. He wouldn’t do that. He’d never do that to Steve. But still…that one little mistake may cost him his best friend.

As Bucky processed his brief second of panic, he realized he was still sitting over Steve, the other boy’s legs around his waist. “Oh-” he choked shortly, his cheeks darkening. “Sorry.” He murmured, just started to pull back, when Steve’s boney hands suddenly snatched up. His thin fingers curled into Bucky’s collar and, in a moment of recklessness, he dragged Bucky down, crushing his mouth against his.

Bucky startled, instinctively going to yank away when the reality of what was happening crashed into him. Steve was kissing him. _Steve_ was kissing _him!_ Like a man dying of thirst, Bucky suddenly found himself drinking Steve in. He pressed in closer, turning his head in and slotting their open mouths together. Pleasure prickled down Bucky’s spine as Steve freed his fingers from his collar, the slender white digits coming up to tangle through Bucky’s dark lock. A soft whine of desperation escaped him as he reciprocated the gesture, carding his hands through Steve’s hair, feeling the fine blond strands slid between his fingers.

The boy’s shifted, and for a maddening second, space broke between their lips. “God-” Bucky whined helplessly, his voice cracking as Steve yanked him desperately back into the kiss. His mouth was warm, and wet, working hungrily against his own. Bucky could feel the desperation and pet up emotion escaping Steve’s tiny body, one hand freeing itself from his hair and moving to scrape down his back. Bucky shuddered. Every time they parted, even for a moment, he felt the loss, and Bucky wondered his he’d _ever_ survived a second without having Steve’s lips on his.

Steve lay back on the couch, instinctively tightening his legs around Bucky’s waist. He wanted him closer. He needed him closer, and after all this time, he was afraid that if he let go, he’d find himself waking up, achingly hard and in need of a frigid shower. Steve shivered, feeling Bucky’s hand in his hair, gripping, and tugging gently at the soft locks. A little start of alarm shuddered through him as Steve suddenly felt the tip of Bucky’s tongue touching against the entrance of his mouth. Bucky must have felt the tiny, uncertain movement, because he reigned himself back, suddenly hyper-aware of Steve’s comfort.

The older boy broke the kiss, gasping helplessly, panting in wide-eyed silence. He stared down at Steve, all flushed, and delicate, his lips damp and swollen from the kiss. “Sorry.” Bucky breathed, not sure if he should be apologizing, but better safe than sorry.

"Don’t-" Steve said shortly, moving his hands down to take Bucky’s collar again. "Yer fine, I was surprised is all I- I don’t mind." He stammered, his word falling out quick and clumsy. But it didn’t matter. His message got across.

Bucky smirked, feeling a little bit of his confidence return. Steve looked so eager, so…pleased… He wanted to make him look like that all the time. Bucky gaze dropped to Steve’s fingers, clutching his now wrinkled collar. “Y’gonna make it a habit’a man-handlin’ me?” He purred, watching Steve’s gaze follow his own.

Steve’s eyes flickered back up to Bucky, looking a litter uncertain before he slipped into his role, playing their little game. “Y’like that?” He asked quietly, his voice lacking Bucky’s confidence and bravado, but that was alright. He sounded adorable when he was a little shy.

Bucky moved in, purposely touching his mouth to Steve’s without actually giving him he satisfaction of a real kiss. “We’ll see how it goes.” He breathed, smirking against Steve’s mouth. It was funny how four minute ago, Steve had been cackling as Bucky had tickled him. Three minutes ago, Bucky had been so scared he’d though he might throw up, and two minutes ago they’d been making out on the couch, and now they were…flirting? Were they flirting? Bucky had mastered the tactic with girls, but it had always felt oddly forced. With Steve it felt so natural that he almost hadn’t realized they’d been doing it.

Now, Steve was staring up at him through his long, dark lashes, his tongue touching softly against his lower lip: a silent invitation. Bucky exhaled softly, feeling Steve’s breath on his mouth as he brought their lips together once more. Steve tasted just as sweet the second time as the first, only this time, Bucky allowed his tongue to slide between his best friend’s lips, exploring the warm, wet of his mouth.

At the sensation of Bucky’s tongue sliding against his own, Steve felt his body flood with heat and desperation. He arched his back, craning closer as Bucky pressed him into the kiss. His cock had grown hard at the sudden sensation, and Steve could feel Bucky’s own member growing erect, pressing between his legs. Oh god. What the hell was going on here? This couldn’t possibly be real.

All the same, Steve dragged Bucky closer, shifting his mouth to fit more perfectly against the curve of Bucky’s. His shirt had ridden up the narrow cut of his boney hips. The exposed skin, prickling from the cold air, suddenly went warm as Bucky’s wide palm rested against his waist, his fingers tracing just under the hem of his shirt. Steve gasped in pleasure, raising his hips.

Bucky, encouraged by the happy little noises Steve was making into his open mouth, moved his over hand down to his waist. The older boy slid his hand up under Steve’s shirt, sliding it up to his collarbone, running his hands along his porcelain skin the entire way. He broke the kiss for just a moment, tugging Steve’s shirt off over his head, freeing the boy’s arms from the material. “You okay Stevie?” He asked breathlessly. The happy little gasps and moan that he had coaxed from Steve’s throat gave Bucky confidence enough, but he still wanted his verbal confirmation.

Jus’ fine.” Steve breathed, his words slightly slurred, dizzy with pleasure. “Yer mouth tastes like that toxic shit you made me try though.”

A low chuckle escaped Bucky’s lips, and he paused a moment, shedding his own shirt before he reached over, pulling the bottle of good liquor off the coffee table. His gray eyes stole over to Steve, meeting his gaze. A little, flirtatious smirk touched the older boy’s lips and he uncorked the half-empty bottle, never once breaking eye contact. His wet, pink tongue teased over his plump lower lip as he raised the bottle to his mouth, taking a swallow of the good liquor. It tingled and burned all the way down his throat, hitting his stomach warm, just like it was supposed to. It was potent, but Bucky didn’t care. Steve lay beneath him, looking fascinated, and oddly aroused. The dark haired boy took another deep swallow; letting his lips slide from the rim with an obscene gasp.

Wordlessly, he slid a hand under Steve’s neck, feeling the notches of his spine through his paper-thin skin. He guided the blond up, raising him into a half sitting position before lifting the bottle to Steve’s parted lips. The boy kept his hands at his sides, his elbows holding his weight up, even with Bucky’s hand remaining on his neck. He let Bucky touch the rim of the bottle to his mouth, and Steve parted his lips, closing them over the opening. Bucky lifted the back of the bottle, letting a controlled amount of the liquor flow into the neck of the bottle, a few droplets escaping the corners of Steve’s mouth as he took a deep swallow.

Bucky had been right, it was better. It burned, and stung, and caused moisture to prick at the corners of Steve’s eyes, but there was something invigorating about it. It was dangerous, and for a sixteen year old, a little forbidden, and it came directly from Bucky’s hand. Steve had to admit, there was something decidedly erotic about lying back, and letting Bucky pour the alcohol into his waiting mouth. He felt helpless, and yet at the same time, completely in control. It was intoxicating.

The older boy stared, his jaw going slack as he watched. Steve’s wet lips were closed over the mouth of the bottle, his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed. The sight was purely sinful. Bucky tore his eyes from Steve’s gorgeous mouth, only to see Steve staring back at him. His piercing, baby blue eyes were locked on Bucky’s, and the older boy found himself frozen in place. Steve wasn’t blinking, or shying away from him. The stare was erotic, challenging. For a moment, Steve’s eyelids lowered, his long lashes touching his cheekbones. Pretty pink lips worked along the mouth of the bottle, and the boy gave a hum of pleasure that went straight to Bucky’s cock. He swallowed, almost overwhelmed because his Stevie was so fucking perfect. His long, dark lashes feather across his cheekbones, and his blond hair was mussed from Bucky’s hands. His expression was soft, slack with pleasure as his mouth worked obscenely over the rim of the bottle. His flushed lips slid a little further on the bottle, taking more of the neck in his mouth before sliding back to the rim again, lapping eagerly at whatever little bit of alcohol now managed to dribble down the neck. Bucky had forgotten to keep pouring a long time ago.

In a moment, Bucky came back to himself, and he slowly lowered the bottle, Steve releasing it with a sound that was purely pornographic. The older boy swallowed, managing to set aside the bottle without taking his eyes off Steve. “Fuck…” He gasped softly, his mind numb with an overwhelming desire for Steve to do exactly what he’d done to that bottle to his cock.

Steve glanced up, wet mouthed and apparently innocent. He looked angelic, but he was perfectly aware of the things his little show was doing to his best friend’s imagination. “You’re right…that _was_ better…” He murmured, unable to ignore how hard Bucky had grown. His erection was pressing into him, is not a little painfully, than distractingly.

Bucky managed a dumb nod, everything in him wanting to ask Steve to try, wanting to feel his pretty pink mouth stretched around his cock. But he couldn’t bring himself to ask. He was afraid that Steve would echo his earlier sentiment about the mixed alcohol. _Why the hell would you think I’d want that in my mouth?_ So he swallowed it back.

At Bucky’s unsatisfactory response, Steve’s expression grew thoughtful. He’d been watching Bucky’s expression the entire time he’d had the bottle in his mouth. He’d watched him though his lashes. Bucky had been aroused; incredibly aroused. He’d wanted that, and Steve felt a sudden curl of nervous anticipation in his stomach.

Rather than lying back down, Steve sat forward more fully. He shifted his weight forward into Bucky’s lap, gently guiding his back against the couch. The dark hair boy leaned into the cushions obligingly, letting Steve chose the direction. He had to admit, it was nice having Steve in his lap, but he was embarrassingly hard. His erection was straining against the front of his pants, pressing painfully against his zipper. Precum leaked from the slit, dampening his boxers. He wanted to stroke himself, but Steve seemed to have something else in mind.

The blond leaned in, closing his mouth softly over Bucky’s lower lip, sucking on it softly. He could feel Bucky going weak under his touch, settling into the couch. He pressed deeper. Steve released Bucky’s plush lower lip, bringing his mouth against the older boy’s. The alcohol had been good, but it tasted even better on Bucky’s lips. Steve’s arms twined around the brunet’s neck, drawing him closer, pressing their mouths together. The pressure was warm and wet as they made out again the couch; desperate, and needy, hungry, and horny. The liquor was sharp on the boy’s tongues, adding a bite to the kiss that sent shivers of pleasure up the length of their spines.

Steve broke the tension of the kiss. He was flushed, and panting, his lips glossy with excess saliva. The blond caught his breath and pressed a kiss to the corner of Bucky’s mouth. After dwelling there for just a moment, Steve moved on, pressing soft kisses across his jawline and over to his ear, gently nipping at his lobe. “Hold still.” Steve breathed, the words sending a shudder of anticipation through Bucky. How was it that tiny, skinny little Steve was able to completely undo him? He was the one with experience here. He was the one who knew exactly how to get girls in bed with him, exactly how to make them moan, and yet one touch from Steve had him falling apart. One commanding word and he was completely whipped. He would do anything for Steve, and Steve could do anything he liked to him.

For a moment, a little niggle of uncertainty stirred in the pit of Steve’s stomach. Bucky was his best friend. Best friends didn’t do these kinds of things with each other. So what did that really make them? The twisting little coil of nervousness persisted until the moment Steve glanced up, and saw Bucky staring at him. His sleepy eyes were hooded, looking drunk on Steve’s affection. A smirk lingered on his perfect lips, blood red, glossy, and curled up at the corners. From under his perfect lashes, Bucky’s eyes were glinting with anticipation. And suddenly, all the nervousness was gone.

Steve pressing in again, laving kisses against Bucky’s throat, working down his neck to his collarbone. Bucky’s skin was hot under his sensitive lips. As Steve’s fingers trailed down his bare chest, he could feel his best friend’s solid muscles just under his tanned skin. He could feel hot blood racing through his body. Steve’s eager mouth worked down his chest, his lips closing over Bucky’s nipple. The older boy gave a shuddering gasp, his jaw going slack with delight.

Bucky’s head dropped back against the couch, lips still parted as Steve’s teeth nipped playfully at the hardened pink nub of flesh. His tongue teased over the sensitive skin, coaxing a gasp from Bucky’s wet lips. Bucky had been with girls before, but nothing in his life to this point had ever felt quite so good.

Steve pulled off, giving the other neglected nipple a few soft teases with his tongue before moving down Bucky’s abdomen, kissing his way down over the solid muscles. As he did, Steve shifted himself to the floor, positioning himself between Bucky’s legs. He was nervous, hell, he was shaking all over, but at the same time, he was excited. He wanted to try what he’d imagined doing so many times. He wanted to see how it felt. He wanted to make Bucky feel good. Slowly, the younger boy unzipped Bucky’s pants, his heart stuttering in his chest as he saw the outline of his cock straining against his boxers. Experimentally, Steve bowed his head, his breath warming through the flimsy cloth.

A shudder ran up Bucky’s spine, his head snapping forward to stare down at Steve as the other boy tentatively touched his mouth to the fabric. “Steve-” Bucky choked, the word dying halfway out of his throat. Steve’s baby-blue eye flickered up to him, staring, waiting in eager anticipation. That pretty, talented mouth of his rested just against his boxers, just enough to feel him, not enough to give him any relief. After a long moment, Bucky suddenly realized that Steve was waiting for his consent. His blue eyes were locked on Bucky’s gray, his expression patient, unpressuring.

Bucky swallowed hard, feeling dizzy. His lips parted helplessly at the sight of his best friend, couched between his legs, his mouth tucked against his lap, looking up at him, his gaze boring into him. Slowly, Bucky managed a nod, drunk with pleasure. “Only if you want to.” He rasped, very cautious of doing anything that might make Steve feel pressured into going further than he wanted too.

Steve’s lips twitched into a tiny smile, his eyes going dark with a mischievous glint. Slowly, he pulled on Bucky’s pants, sliding them lower on his hips. The drag of the material against his sensitive cock drew a soft cry from Bucky’s lips, his eyelids fluttering closed. The sensations were getting to be overwhelming. Bucky was desperate to be touched. He was aching. But he had to be patient. Steve would take care of him.

In the same fashion as his slacks, Steve’s chilly fingers worked into the waistband of Bucky’s boxers, drawing them down slowly. Bucky lifted his hips, eager, and greedy, allowing Steve to strip him more easily. Finally, he dropped back on the couch, completely exposed, his pants around his ankles. Steve, still half dressed, stared down at his leaking cock, his eyes fixated in the flushed head. Bucky suddenly felt a wave if uncertainty, and he abruptly reached out, cupping the side of Steve’s face.

Steve startled at the contact, tearing his eyes away from Bucky’s erect member. He looked up, meeting Bucky’s gaze. He looked concerned, and oddly…shy.

"You don’t have too." Bucky pressed, his cheeks darkening as the blood rushed to his face. "Please don’t think you have too…"

Steve leaned forward, not breaking eye contact, moving in until his breath ghosted over the head of Bucky’s cock. “I want to.” He assured him softly, the sensation of his hot breath making Bucky’s cock twitch with interest.

Bucky swallowed, not yet satisfied. He had to be sure, completely sure, 100% if thing were to go any further. “I know. He said shortly. “But if-“

“Bucky!” Steve interrupted, pulling back just an inch. His perfect mouth had tugged into a tiny, appreciative smile. He understood what Bucky was doing, and it meant a lot, “Relax.” The younger boy pressed. “I’m picky, I don’t put things in my mouth if I don’t want them there.” This earned him a tiny laugh from Bucky, and a little of the tension eased from his body.  Steve leaned back in, closing the distance between his swollen lips, and the flushed head of Bucky’s cock. “Relax…” Steve breathed and a soft moan escaped Bucky’s lips. His head went heavy, dropping back against the couch once more. It was odd that _he_ was the one reassuring Bucky; cause Bucky was the one with experience. Steve had never been with a girl in his life, he’d certainly never take’n another man’s cock in his mouth. Yet here he was, assuring Bucky that it was all okay.

Tentatively, Steve moved forward, exhaling a nervous breath before taking the plunge. His touched his mouth to the head of Bucky’s cock. The contact was maddeningly light, his lips brushing, feather light over the sensitive skin. Even so, just that had Bucky squirming in pleasure. Experimentally, Steve let his tongue poke out from between his lips, letting just the tip of his warm, wet tongue touch the base of his cock head.

Bucky whined, squeezing his eyes closed as Steve tentatively licked his cock. Tiny, wet touches. Barely there. Maddeningly light. “Stevie.” He panted, one hand moving to card through his hair. “Y-yer- fuck.” He choked. “Fuck. Yer killin’ me Steve…” Bucky gasped, frustrated almost to tears by the sensation. It was heavenly, but it wasn’t enough.

Steve’s lips curled into a smile against Bucky’s cock. It was strangely satisfying to know just how easily he could undo his best friend. Slowly, Steve slid his tongue along the under side of Bucky cock, licking a hot strip from base to head. As he reached the tip, the taste of Bucky’s precum met his tongue, salty, and musky. He laved his tongue over the head, savoring the milky beads of fluid as they collected in Bucky’s slit. He’d imagined tasting Bucky like this before. He’d never imagined he’d actually do it. Yet all the same, here he was.

Encouraged by Bucky’s helpless little moans of pleasure, Steve continued. He tentatively closed his lips over the head of his cock, savoring the taste, the warmth, the heaviness. He wanted more. The younger boy’s lips slid further down the length of Bucky’s member, taking more of it into his eager mouth, concentrating on working his lips and tongue to pleasure the dark haired boy.

At the feeling of his aching, sensitive cock being enveloped in the wet heat of Steve’s mouth, Bucky gave a shuddering gasp. Every fiber in his being felt as though it was on fire. His nerve endings were crackling with pleasure, delight racing up and down his spine like electric. Steve’s technique was clumsy, and inexperienced, but Bucky could care less because it was _Steve_! It was Steve, who he’d loved, and pined over his whole life. It was Steve, who he’d kill for, who he’d had harbored and hidden feeling for as long as he could remember. And now, he was kneeling between his legs, his gorgeous, perfect mouth stretched around his cock.

The beautiful boy looked up, catching Bucky’s gaze from under his heavy, dark lashes and Bucky felt his heart stutter in his chest. “Fuck…” The dark haired boy breathed, his breath catching as Steve’s tongue teased along the underside of his cock. “Fuck Stevie you’re- you’re perfect- you’re- _ah_! A cry of pleasure escaped his lips, and Bucky suddenly bent forward, his forehead nearly touching the top of Steve’s head, his fingers gripping into his shoulder.

Steve pulled back, dragging his lips along his shaft until just the head of his cock remain in his mouth, leaving the rest wet and cold. He could feel Bucky’s fingers tightening through his hair, his other hand gripping his shoulder so hard he thought he might bruise his fragile skin, but Steve didn’t care. He sucked on the head of Bucky’s cock, increasing the pressure until the older boy gave a husky little moan, his breath hot in Steve’s hair. He sounded absolutely wrecked, and Steve knew he had him completely wrapped around his finger. Bucky’s cock was leaking profusely now and Steve could tell he was close. He wasn’t about to pull off now. The blond haired boy gave the flushed cock head another attentive lick before he slid his mouth back down along Bucky’s shaft. In a moment, Steve had buried his nose in the short, wiry hairs at the base of Bucky’s cock. He choked softly, feeling the head nudge against the back if his throat, causing little bursts of white to swim in his vision.

Hot blood pounded through Bucky’s body, his pleasure beginning to boarder on physical pain. But god, he didn’t want it to end. Steve was _so_ perfect. His breath was hot against his stomach, and Bucky could feel the walls of his throat constricting as he choked softly on the head if his cock. The part of Bucky that was still grounded to reality wanted to check on Steve, make sure he was okay, but his head was swimming with pleasure, his body wracked with shudders. He was barely thinking enough to keep from thrusting roughly into Steve’s mouth, to keep from letting his hips snap forward and shove the whole of his length down Steve’s gorgeous throat. He didn’t want to hurt him. Even through the haze of pleasure Bucky knew he wouldn’t hurt him. But when Steve lifted his beautiful blue eyes up to his, staring so eager and excited, all of Bucky’s concerns fell away. Steve was enjoying this just as much as he was.

Suddenly, Bucky felt his orgasm coming to the cusp; pleasure and tension filling his body, pushing outward, straining for release. “Steve-” he managed as the younger boy gave a particularly long swipe with his tongue, sliding his perfect mouth up and back along Bucky’s cock. “Steve I’m gonna- I- y- you can-” he stammered, tripping over his words, his mind scrambling as he felt himself getting closer. But one stern look from Steve told him he wasn’t going to be pulling off. He slid further down, taking the whole of Bucky’s length into his mouth once more, sucking hungrily, laving his tongue over the sensitive flesh.

Bucky came with a choked cry, doubling forward as his hot wet cum gushed into Steve’s mouth. The younger boy swallowed clumsily, coughing, little droplets of the milky fluid escaping the corners of his lips and cutting thin trails down his chin and neck. He sucked greedily on Bucky’s cock, cleaning the last traces from his skin. Bucky found his lips pressed into Steve’s sweaty hair, breathing in his scent, his fingers frozen in a death grip on Steve’s shoulder. Reluctantly, he loosened his grip, dragging in a shaky breath. Steve’s mouth was still warm around his softening cock, still licking, and sucking gently.

"Steve…" Bucky managed breathlessly, sitting up a bit and touching his hand along the blond’s jawline.

Steve glanced up, meeting Bucky’s sleepy, satisfied gaze with a thrill of delight. He pulled back slowly, working his mouth back nice and slow, before finally releasing the head of Bucky’s cock with an obscenely wet _pop_. Steve kept his eyes on his face, watching his expression go slack with pleasure at the sensation before relaxing again.

"C’mere…" He said thickly, gently drawing Steve up off of his bruised knees. Bucky pulled Steve up, collecting him into his arms. He exhaled deeply, nuzzling his nose against Steve’s throat, one hand wandering down his side. "That was perfect…" He whispered, breathing the words directly into Steve’s ear, because he knew his best friend’s hearing was shoddy at best. "That was perfect…you’re… _perfect_ …Steve…you’re…" Bucky’s hand slid into Steve’s lap and his gaze suddenly snapped down, seeing the outline of his cock, still achingly hard, still pressing against the confines of his slacks. A soft, distressed noise escaped Bucky throat as he looked down, his gaze snapping back up to Steve. "Steve you’re- I’m sorry-" he stammered. "God- _fucking selfish dick_ \- lay down." He breathed, gently easing Steve back, laying him down on the threadbare cushion.

Bucky’s distressed muttering coaxed a little laugh out of Steve, an affectionate smile tugging at his lips as Bucky tenderly undressed him. “S’fine…” He murmured, his mouth starting to taste cottony after the blowjob.

"No." Bucky scoffed, looking thoroughly agitated. "It’s not fine. God- haven’t touched ya this whole time, fucking stupid- _selfish_ -"

Steve reached up, seizing the back of his neck, and drawing Bucky down into a kiss. As their lips met, Bucky’s string of self-depreciating comments was cut off, abruptly silenced by the sensation of Steve’s mouth on his. But his promise was far from forgotten. Bucky shifted forward, bracing his weight over Steve’s naked body, his fingers caressing his chest and hips. He deepened the kiss, feeling the warm, wet curve of Steve’s mouth fitting against his, tasting himself on Steve’s lips and tongue. The older boy’s hand moved slowly down to Steve’s cock, wrapping gently around the base.

At the long awaited touch, Steve felt a groan of pleasure rising in his throat. His cock was twitching, throbbing with pain. After going so long untouched, Bucky’s warm, steady hand was a welcomed relief. The brunet’s fingers curled artfully around Steve’s cock, sliding up his shaft easily before tightening at the head, giving a little twist that sent a delightful burn of friction through his entire body. Steve had never realized that having someone’s hand on his cock could feel this good. Or, maybe it only felt this good because it was Bucky. Either way, the sensation was purely addictive.

Bucky repeated the movement, stroking Steve’s cock with practiced precision. Bucky had spent many dark, lonely night jerking himself off after waking up in a cold sweat, achingly hard from lewd, filthy dreams about Steve. He’d learned quickly what made him feel good, he only hoped it was good enough for Steve. Because Steve deserved nothing less than the best he could give him.

Bucky broke the kiss for just a moment, catching his breath and drinking in the sight below him. Steve lay on the couch cushion, his face flushed a delicate pink, his wet lips parted to emit soft pants and gasps of pleasure. The boy’s gaze was turned down, watching in stunned fascination as Bucky worked his cock, sending waves of pleasure through his body.

"That good Stevie?" Bucky panted, trailing his lips down the blond’s throat. He felt Steve’s Adam’s apple tease against his lips as Steve swallowed, his breath hitching in his chest.

"It’s- ah! Bucky-" Steve gasped, his voice cracking as Bucky gave the hardened member an experimental squeeze. "God-" Steve choked. "God, Bucky, don’t- don’t stop I’m- I’m-"

"Shhhh…" Bucky hushed him, moving up from his throat and stroking one finger over Steve’s plush lower lip. "Quiet Stevie…" He murmured, capturing the other boy’s mouth in a tender kiss. His touch grew light, caressing him softly as his cock twitched against his fingers. Bucky let his tongue slide, warm, and wet into his mouth, swiping it tantalizingly over Steve’s own. His movement became so soft, so tender, that Steve wondered why he’d ever been afraid to wish that Bucky would touch him. The kiss was delicate, sincere; almost…loving…it felt warm, and safe.

Bucky eased his weight down softly, pressing his warmer body in over Steve’s not wanting his exposed skin to grown cold. His free hand, formerly cupped under his jaw, moved to explore Steve’s chest, and ribs. His fingers played over his hips and stomach, moving up to his neck, rubbing warmth into his prickling skin. All the while he kissed Steve, deep, and tender, like he was the most beautiful creature ever to walk the face of the earth; like he was the only one. His hand moved softly over the blond’s cock, continuing the pleasure the boy so softly, so gently, that Steve mind slipped into a haze of delight.

Bucky brought Steve to the cusp of his orgasm, and with a few more soft, tender strokes, guided him over the edge.

Steve gave a little gasp of pleasure into Bucky’s mouth as he came between Bucky’s fingers. His warm, milky cum streaked his chest, seeping down Bucky’s wrist. A shudder wracked his tiny body, and Steve arched up off the cushion, Bucky instinctively moving to cradle his body closer. The older boy guided him through the after shock of his orgasm, easing him down onto the couch and stroked softly from his ribs to his thighs until the shivers ceased to wrack his body.

Finally, the two boys lay on the couch, sticky, sweaty, and drunk with pleasure. Bucky larger frame was draped over Steve’s tiny, boney body, his warmth protecting him from the chill that seeped under the door. The blond’s head was tipped back, eyes closed in postcoital bliss. His damp, rosy lips were parted, a tiny smile tugging at the corners. Bucky nuzzled his nose softly under Steve’s jawline, kissing him lazily, and stroking his thigh with absent fingers.

"Not crushin’ you am I?" Bucky murmured, tracing his fingers up the soft flesh of Steve’s thigh, finding his way over his prominent hipbones and finally up his narrow ribcage.

Steve gave a wheezing little laugh, reaching up to tangle his finger through Bucky’s dark locks. “Nah…” He breathed. “Yer fine…” Steve eased his head closer, enjoying the feeling of Bucky’s warm breath on his neck, the feeling of his mouth touching his flushed skin. He don’t ever want to have to move…he didn’t want to ever have to get up, and loose the warmth of Bucky’s bare chest against his own, the feeling of their legs tangled so comfortably together. Bucky’s hands were so soft, and so warm against his body, making him feel safe, making him feel, for the first time in his life, really beautiful.

The minutes passed and neither boy made any movement to pull away. They’d both been waiting too long, and the other seemed so content…so, for while the sea of questions was still at bay, they lay together in comfortable silence.

“Bucky?” Steve whispered, dragging his short fingernails softly down the other boy’s back.

Bucky nuzzled deeper into Steve’s neck with a reluctant moan, not wanting to face to world. But Steve’s nails felt so good tracing the length of his spine…a little sigh escaped Bucky and he touched one more tender kiss to Steve’s neck. “What is it Stevie?” He murmured, resting his hands just over Steve’s hips bones.

Steve swallowed, feeling a tiny trace of his old nervousness returning. “Should we talk about…what the hell just happen here?” Because honestly, Steve had no idea. They were best friends, they always had been, but now this happened. And this, what ever this was, had rudely shoved he and Bucky into unknown territory. Steve was no longer certain of their relationship. Could things go back to the way they were before after they’d kissed? After he’d wrapped his mouth around Bucky’s cock and Bucky had stroked him off so gently that his mind went numb with pleasure? Did Steve even want things to go back to the way it was before?

At the nervous tone in Steve’s voice, Bucky felt a chill creep through his exposed body. Instinctively, he pressed in closer, kissing Steve’s throat, laving the attention over his neck for a long moment before answering. “Do you _wanna_ talk about it?” He asked; like Steve, frightened of where this would put their relationship. Steve was pretty much the center of his universe; everything he did was for Steve. And though they’d shared this crazy, stupid, wonderful thing, Bucky was afraid that it’d push Steve away from him. After all, how could Steve look at him the same way after what they’d done tonight?

After a long stretch of silence, Bucky felt Steve wrap his arms cautiously around the back of his neck, drawing him in closer. The gesture was shy, tentative, as though he were afraid Bucky would reject the touch. “No.” The blond admitted. He was too scared to really want to talk about it.

"Good. We don’t have to." Bucky said shortly, gently clapping his palms over Steve’s protruding hipbones, seeming to dismiss the issue. There were too many questions that he wasn’t sure he had the answers too, and things were too perfect as they were. The last thing Bucky wanted to do was ruin it.

Steve considered Bucky’s dismissal, his face still tucked into the crook of Bucky’s neck, arms around his shoulders. He didn’t want to push the issue, hell, he was scared to death of the answer he might receive, but it sat on his chest like a weight. Did Bucky expect that they could pretend like this didn’t even happen? Was this…purely physical? Two horny teens fucking cause they could? The thought made Steve sick, because the longer he thought about it, the more he had to admit that he was in love with Bucky. He didn’t want to be the friend the Bucky could fuck with because they were both game for it, he wanted Bucky to love him…he wanted this to be because they loved each other…But admitting that to the older boy scared him to death. If a ‘friends-with-benefits’ situation was all Bucky expected out of this, and Steve brought _love_ into the equation, it’d drive a wedge between them for sure. But he had to know.

"Bucky?"

At the breach of the silence, the older boy pulled back, bracing his weight over Steve as he stared down at him. His own growing unease about the situation was making him feel tense, and on edge. “Yeah.” He said in a clipped tone. “What is it?”

Bucky’s terse reply startled Steve, and he boy blinked rapidly, dropping his arms away from his neck. He felt suddenly cold. “I just…wanted to know what this…made us…” Steve managed, forcing the words from between his reluctant lips.

Bucky sat back completely now, drawing away from Steve, his body going tense with a nervous panic. His heart was pounding in his chest, jarring uncomfortably against his ribs. He felt sick. He felt fifteen again, curled up in his bed and sobbing because he couldn’t handle the feelings he had for his best friend. “Fuck- I- I dunno Steve, who the hell cares?” He blurted. He was panicking. He was panicking and he knew it. He was too scared of loosing Steve, of letting his desire to love him get in the way of the friendship they’d always had, that he was saying thing he didn’t mean. He was panicking, and it was hurting Steve.

" _I_ care!" The blond protested, sitting up now, his stomach in knots. Bucky had moved away from him. He was standing now, backing away from the couch like he didn’t want Steve near him. Like he didn’t want him….

"Steve-" Bucky swallowed, giving a vicious little shake of his head. "That’s _not_ what I meant."

"Then spit it out Barnes." Steve snapped, his face clouding with anger as he pushed off the couch. He stepped over the pile of clothing; strewn in the floor of lustful hast, closing the distance between himself and Bucky. The older boy had backed himself against the wall now, his jaw locked, eyes flashing with barely suppressed panic.

"This doesn’t have to change anything." Bucky snapped, and instantly wished he could summon the words back; swallow them, choke on them, he didn’t care, anything so long as he didn’t have to see the look on Steve’s face.

The blond drew back, suddenly feeling sick. That was it then. Exactly what he’d been afraid of. This had been a mistake, spurred by hormones and a little ill-timed intimacy. _Of course_ this didn’t change anything. They were just friends. Best friends. Steve was Bucky’s best friend, who he could kiss, and touch. He didn’t love him. Of course not, why would he? What was Steve compared to a pretty dame with softly lips and softer breasts. How could he compare to a beautiful, healthy young woman who had so much more to offer Bucky, not only physically, but also socially. Bucky would never have to worry about hiding if he was going steady with a dame. No. He was just Steve. Bucky’s _best friend_. Why had he let himself think he could be anything else?

Steve stepped back a pace, stumbling a step before turning, moving to stoop down and collect his damp boxer from the floor. Everything was white noise. The world had gone oddly slow, and the sudden shock of pain in his chest faded to numbness.

Sickening realization sunk like a rock in the pit of Bucky’s stomach as he watched Steve turn away from him, his gorgeous feature written with pain. “Steve-” Bucky blurted suddenly lunging forward and seizing the other boy’s wrist.

The contact sliced through the haze in Steve’s mind like a knife; bring the white-hot pain of the rejection suddenly blistering to the surface again. Bucky pulled him around to face him and Steve’s head snapped around, his teeth set.

"Steve, hang on-"

"Y’know, I actually heard you loud and clear the first time." Steve said shortly, twisting his wrist from Bucky’s grip. "So, yeah. This has been a lot of fun, but I think I’ll take my chances outside. Nice to know we’re still friends.

"I thought that’s what you wanted!" Bucky protested, his face flushed red, his head pounding as he tried to say the right things only to end up spitting out the worst thing he could have possibly said.

"Sure." Steve snapped. "Just friends worked great until about an hour ago when we making in on the couch. ‘Just friends’ worked until I had your freaking _cock_ in my mouth! But _sure_ , I’m sure I can forget _all_ about that the next time you’re telling me, in vivid detail, about the latest girl you fucked in a broom closet!"

In one, swift movement, Bucky grabbed Steve’s shoulder, pulling him closer, his fingers gripping into his delicate flesh. “Will ya sit yer self-righteous ass down for a second and _listen_ to me?” Bucky snapped, his voice cracking traitorously at the end. “‘ _Just friends’_ has never worked for me, okay? I’ve wanted your skinny little ass since I learned how this stuff worked! Dont’cha get it? It’s always been about you Steve! Every time I’ve been with a girl I’ve been thinkin’ about you. Every time you slept over, since before I could remember, I’ve looked over an seen ya sleepin next to me and thought _just maybe_ I could sneak a kiss but I didn’t cause when I finally did get to kiss you I wanted you t’be lookin’ back at me.” Bucky set his jaw, his fingers tightening around Steve’s upper arms. “Then y’kissed me. And we…and _that_ happened, and it was _perfect_ , but I couldn’t imagine that bein’ with me was what you really, honestly wanted. There were a hundred reasons that I couldn’t let myself believe it, cause _maybe_ you’ve got a low alcohol tolerance and a few swallows made yer brain funny, or _maybe_ you were just in the mood and didn’t really care if it was me, or if it was a dame or anyone else, so I let it slid. Cause…cause havin’ you in my life was more important than tellin’ you I loved you…cause I’d rather have kept that to myself and let it eat at me my whole life than to loose you…so…what happened between us…and…what I just told you…it doesn’t have to change anything…cause I want you in my life. I don’t care how.”

Steve jaw went slack as he stared at Bucky, struck dumb by the brutal honesty of his words. It almost sounded as though Bucky was echo what Steve had thought to himself time and time again, and for a brief moment, Steve honestly couldn’t remember just how much of his feelings he’d divulged to his best friend. _None_. Steve had never dared to speak about his feelings for Bucky, and yet here he was speaking exactly what Steve had been sitting on since he was eight or nine years old.

Slowly, the blond came back to himself, his eyelids fluttering rapidly. “But-” he started helplessly, his mind scrambling for an appropriate response. “You were always such a fuckin’ skirt-chaser!”

Bucky froze, and for a horrible moment, Steve thought he’d demolished what little progress they’d made. Suddenly, Bucky gave a short bark of laughter. Mercifully, his grip loosed on Steve upper arms and the brunet ducked his head away. “Yeah Steve… _course_ I was…I mean…All those bastards need is an excuse to start crackin’ yer head into the pavement for bein’ queer. If all people ever saw was you and me, y’think they’d leave you alone?” Bucky pressed, giving a little scoff. “I knew I’d be fine, dames aren’t all bad but…they’d hurt you Stevie…It’d be better for me t-”

"Let um try." Steve snapped lifting his chin with a sudden burning anger in his eyes. "I’d love to see anyone give us trouble and walk away from it."

Bucky faltered slightly, his heart giving a little stutter in his chest. He was used to Steve trying to pick fights, that was nothing new. Nobility, justice, it was all old hat, but- “ _Us_?” Bucky asked dumbly, staring at Steve in pure disbelief because all this time he’d imagined his affection was one-sided.

Steve looked up, the righteous anger slowly burning out of his eyes as he met Bucky’s gaze, his expression going soft. “Well… _yeah_ …you and me…end of the line…that what we’ve always said, isn’t it?”

Bucky swallow, giving a little noncommittal jerk of his head. “Well, yeah…” He drawled, flushing a he realized he was parroting Steve’s words. “It’s just- it’s different when you’re just… _friends_ …”

Steve dropped his eyes to the ground, feeling the chill from outside seep through the windows, snaking around the cold wood floor and raising goose flesh over his naked body. “Who says I want that?” Steve asked, his words barely audible. “Who says I’m okay with ‘ _just friends’_?”

"Aren’t you?" The question hung in the cool air, throbbing, demanding attention, demanding an answer.

"No…" Steve admitted, hesitating for a moment, before slowly lifting his eyes to Bucky’s "haven’t really been okay with ‘ _just friends’_ for a long time…"

Bucky swallowed hard, feeling warmth prickling through his body, an eager nervousness begging to tingle at his finger tips. “How long?” He asked, daring to draw a bit closer, daring to softy touch his fingers to Steve’s side.

Steve startled slightly at the contact, his eyes snapping down to where Bucky’s fingers rested against his porcelain flesh. Slowly, the blond readjusted to the sensation of Bucky touching his exposed skin. His flesh grew warm under the touch. “Embarrassingly long.” Steve murmured, slowly easing forward until his forehead rested comfortably on Bucky’s collarbone. And it was as though suddenly, everything was right. Encouraged by Steve reciprocation of the affection, Bucky rested his hand fully on the other boy’s waist. The brunet turned his head into the crook of Steve’s neck, pressing in closer, once again warming Steve’s naked body with his own. The younger boy smile softly, gently settling into Bucky’s chest, his arms snaking around his waist when Bucky suddenly drew back.

"Hey, hang on a second," Bucky murmured, cupping Steve’s face in his hands and pressing a reassuring kiss to his mouth. "Hang on…come with me…"

Steve blinked, uncertainly curling in the pit of his stomach despite Bucky’s reassurance. The older boy slid his hands away from Steve’s waist, gently taking his small, boney hand, wrapping it in his wide, warm palm. With a small smile, and a gentle tug, Bucky lead him down the familiar hallway, pushing open the door to his bedroom.

Steve drew to a stop, staring into the room, empty, and dark, the bed still unmade. Bucky’s body was warm against his bare back, the notches of his spine pressing into the older boy's firm muscles. "Go in and lay down." Bucky instructed, his voice a murmur as his hand slid down his spine, coming to rest over the smaller boy’s ass. He gripped it cheekily, a soft chuckle escaping his lips as he pressed an affectionate little kiss behind his ear. Steve felt his heart give a nervous little stutter in his chest.

"Uh- hey Buck-“ He started nervously as Bucky guided him through the doorway. “B- Baby step okay?" Steve stammered, suddenly very intimidated by the thought of actually having sex with Bucky. Giving his best friend a blowjob had been a pretty huge baby step but Steve wasn’t ready for this. It wasn’t that he didn’t want it, Steve could imagine himself loving sex with Bucky, but…not yet. He was too uncertain, too new to this whole thing. And although Steve was certain Bucky would handle him with the upmost care, Steve wasn’t sure he was ready to loose his virginity.

Bucky scoffed, pressing another kiss behind his ear. “Relax Stevie.” He breathed dismissively. “I’m not gonna fuck you.” The brunet hesitated a moment, before gently taking Steve’s shoulder’s turning the other boy around to face him. He looked nervous. Uncertain. His pretty cheeks were flushed a delicate pink and his gaze kept stealing nervously over Bucky’s body. The older boy have a soft tisk of his tongue, and he reached up, softly smoothing his hands over Steve’s damp blond hair. He drew him into a tender, reassuring kiss, continuing to gently play his fingers through his soft lock. “Jus’ make yourself comfy okay? I’ll be right back.” He murmured against his lips, giving him another quick peck before pulling back.

At Bucky’s reassurance, the nervousness peeled away. If Bucky said that wasn’t the direction this was going, then he trusted him completely. His body felt unnaturally cold as Bucky slipped away, leaving him in the empty room. Steve padded, barefoot over to the edge if the bed, turning on the little lamp on the nightstand before he crawled into Bucky’s bed. It wasn’t luxurious by any stretch if the imagination, but it was softer, and wider than his. The blanket that covered the top sheet was nice and thick. He’d always loved sleeping in Bucky’s bed. But it felt lonely without him.

A minute later, Bucky appeared in the doorway. He closed the bedroom door behind with a soft click and slipped to the edge if the bed. “Here.” He murmured, depositing their tangled mess of clothing at the foot of the bed before handing Steve a glass if cold water. “Yer mouth must taste pretty nasty…”

Steve managed a little smile, nodding his thanks as he took the glass in his boney fingers. “It’s not bad.” He said dismissively, taking a few swallows of the water before setting it aside.

"Lay back," Bucky instructed, reaching over to where a warm washcloth was beginning to soak a dark spot on the armload of clothing.

Steve sunk back into the soft pillow that rested against Bucky’s headboard, watching as the brunet’s slender fingers lifted the rag. The cloth was warm against his chilly skin, softly cleaning away the cooled sweat and dried cum off of his chest. Bucky’s touch was gentle, and attentive as he worked the warm cloth from his neck down to his hips before gently smoothing it over Steve’s soft cock.

The blond hummed quietly at the touch, his eyelids fluttering closed. The cloth lifted from his skin, leaving the moisture to cool in its wake. A moment later, Steve felt Bucky’s familiar weight settle on top of him, the older boy’s nose tucked just under his jawline.

"Feel better Stevie?" He murmured, gently kissing his throat.

"Less sticky…" He responded, not even bothering to open his eyes. He was just fine here. He trusted Bucky.

"Good."

After Bucky had reassured himself that Steve was comfortable, the two slipped into a deep, heavy silence. The night grew darker around them, until only the dim bulb of the lamp lit the room. Chests rose and fell in unison; naked bodies curled close for warmth. Occasionally, Bucky would kiss Steve, on the lips, on the neck, or cheek, wherever he could reach. Steve would hum his quiet consent. After so long, neither one ever wanted the night to end.

Bucky blinked his heavy eyelids, feeling his body growing numb, and sleepy. His mouth was dry, and his mind was fuzzy, but there was one more thing that was still weighing on him, and if he knew Steve, it was weighing on him too. “Stevie?” He murmured, pecking a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth.

Steve stirred; slowly turning his head to the side and blinking his eyes open. “Mmmhh…” He hummed softly, the tip if his tongue poking out to damped his dry lips. “Yeah Buck?”

"Do you…wanna do this? Like, for real? Could we be… _together_?"

Bucky gave it a moment to let Steve’s sleepy mind process the question, before a soft smile touched the boy’s mouth. “Took y’long enough to ask…” He slurred, nuzzling his nose in against Bucky’s.

The older boy gave a soft laugh, nuzzling Steve in response and pressing a sleepy kiss to his Stevie’s perfect pink lips. “Only took me seventeen years…punk.” He punctuated the last word with a tender kiss, drawing the small boy’s still naked frame against his. Finally, after so many nights if sleeping in the same bed as Steve, Bucky was finally able to kiss the beautiful blond to sleep, just like he’d always wanted.

 


End file.
